Thanks so much for all of the encouragement and great ideas I received after my meltdown last week! I was feeling stuck...I knew I had a lot to do, but I couldn't take the steps to get it all done. When I allowed myself to just breathe (thanks Carrie and Faith Hill), relax for a minute and just let it all go, I was able to get so much accomplished! At this point, I am ok with any task that is left unfinished. I know what is truly important is simple really...to love our new baby that we will soon be holding!
This week, Sophie is the one that needs the extra encouragement. She is so perceptive and fully aware of the natural changes that will come with her baby sister. She has been very weepy and attached to me and seems to be going through some kind of grieving process for the time and attention that she feels she will be losing. It just breaks my heart. She is so sweet to reassure me that she knows she will have to share my lap with someone else now and that is ok with her, but I know she is struggling. She has expressed that she is afraid I will forget about her or not have enough room in my heart for her and her baby sister. I try to tell her all the right things and I am spending some extra special time with her now, but I understand why she is feeling that way. The truth is that I share some of her mixed emotions because change is hard even when it is a good change. When I married Clint, Sophie and I were blessed by the new family that was created and we have shared even greater times together than I could have imagined because of that change, but it was still hard at first. I know that the same will be true with the addition of baby Elizabeth and we have so much to look forward to (except the stinky poopy diapers as Sophie says)! :)
7 comments:
While the first month was hard, Sarah now tells me she wants 2 brothers and 2 sisters - so it does get better and the older sib does adjust. During that first month after Elizabeth arrives, perhaps Sophie could come visit Sarah or we could come get her and take her some place fun as a distraction. Sarah would love it.
Also, involving Sarah in the baby care as much as possible really helped. It made her feel important. Sophie is older than Sarah was, so I'm sure she'll be a big help to you, and she'll love all your words of thanks and praise for her help.
Sophie, the super duper Sister, has such an important job: loving her little sister. No one else will be able to do that but her. You'll get two daughters, but she'll have just one sister.
we are praying for you and excited to hear the great news!! Those tears will be exclusively joy soon :) Can't wait to hear the great news!!!
hey Kristen,
Let me tell you from a mom going through the first month, it is hard, and there will be tears of grieving the wonderful period that you and Sophie have gotten to spend together. I get through by telling myself that there is no greater gift I could give Lucy than a sibling, someone else to learn to love and share life with. I just want to encourage you that it's ok to grieve and cry and celebrate, besides with all the hormones coming your way, I'm sure you'll be experiencing all those feelings sometimes within minutes of one another. There is a really cute book that Jodi Drews gave me called "Room in my heart" about a mom having another baby and having room in her heart for both. Maybe Sophie would like that. I also wanted to tell you that some things that have saved me these past weeks are having someone watch Norah, even for 1/2 hour so I can get out and spend one on one time with Lucy. Ok, no more advice, just prayers for a safe birthday, and an open ear if you need someone to talk with.
Love,
Carrie
you said....When I allowed myself to just breathe...relax for a minute and just let it all go, I was able to get so much accomplished!...
sounds a little "bradley" to me! who knew that the secret of a bradley birth could also help you in this moment. i think i'm inspired to breath and relax a little, too. thanks. we love you and we continue to pray for you and your family!
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